Today, a lot of adults including parents are getting diagnosed with a terminal illness. Terminal illness is a condition where the illness of a person is hard to treat and as a result, it leads to eventual death. Christine’s father one morning woke her up and told her that he had cancer. Christine did not know what to do but she thought that her father was going to die the next minute. She was sad and in grief for a long time. She was almost depressed and could not bear the loss of her loving father until she found help. However, her dad was not dead yet but she battled with anxiety and grief at the thought of his sudden death. Christine is not the only young person to have a parent diagnosed (evaluated by the doctors) with a terminal illness.

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The thought of losing your mum or dad can make you anxious, depressed and in grief. This mental conditions can make you act inappropriately and harm yourself or others. Luckily, teens with parents diagnosed with a terminal illness can be helped before its too late. Like Christine, seeking help from professionals will help you get through this challenging time.

PREVALENCE

According to researcher Bunch, depression is closely linked with teens who have parents diagnosed with a terminal illness. Children and teens across the world are prone to this kind of situation as a terminal illness can affect anyone. It is important to seek help as research shows that teens are fives times more likely to commit suicide following the loss of their parents. 

FEELINGS ACCOMPANIED IN CHILDREN AND TEENS WITH PARENTS WHO ARE TERMINALLY ILL.

Christine had mixed reactions and feelings when the father broke to hear the news of his conditions. However, she demonstrated feelings and reactions which if left untreated would result in damaging consequences and possibly her life. First, she was in grief. Grief is a normal human reaction to mourning our departed loved ones. Eventually, humans overcome these feelings. However, prolonged grief is characterized by denial and shock that makes it hard to perform simple tasks in school and at home. Christine was struck by grief as a result of her parent’s sad news.

Secondly, a teen or young adult may experience fear, panic and anxiety attacks. Christine was afraid she would lose her father. This made her panic and act irrationally even though her father was still alive. Panic and anxiety attacks are dangerous to your mental, emotional and physical health as they may make you act irrational and affect your home and school life. This is why it is important to seek help before these conditions harm you or the people around you.

Thirdly, you are experiencing feelings of deep sadness just as Christine did. Sadness is normal and is a natural reaction of human when things become bad. However, deep sadness can result in depression which is dangerous and harmful to your mental and physical health. It affects your ability to function as you normally would.

CAUSES

Every year, a third of people diagnosed with a terminal illness is diagnosed at an age where they could be potential parents. This negatively affects the children and are at a risk for emotional and behavioral changes. Luckily, there is help readily available for children such as you whose parents may be ill.

TREATMENT

Treatment usually involves therapy and in some cases medication. Children and teens who have their parents diagnosed with a terminal illness are prone to other disorders such as grief and anxiety. It is normal to feel grief and deep sorrow because you care for your parent. Perhaps you feel anxious about what the future will hold if your parent does not heal after treatment.  Thus when handling and counseling young persons, treatment for such conditions is done simultaneously with therapy. Medication involving sedatives may be prescribed to weather out the symptoms of grief and anxiety. 

However, not all people seek professional therapy and medication. There are those who talk to their sympathetic friends and family who help in alleviating grief and sorrow. Others join a support group whether online or at a local location. The aim of doing all this is so that you can express yourself and open up through sharing. The situation can be overwhelming and failure to talk or seek help can do more harm than good.

When the parent’s condition worsens, it can be extremely difficult. However, ask for help from older relatives, siblings to assist you. You should not be afraid of your parent (s) in the hospital. Your parents may need you to support them and be strong for them as well. Do not lose hope. Some doctors will prescribe doing an enjoyable activity that will take off the edge and tension building up in your body. All these activities are great, but without the help of a qualified professional, it can be tough to handle all this. Christine sought help after realizing she couldn’t do it all by herself. True to that she got therapy for the disorders and mixed feeling that were brewing up inside her without her knowledge. Do not hesitate to ask for help, it could save your life.

WHERE TO SEEK HELP IN NZ

Do not hesitate to talk to someone about your problem with dealing with your parent’s illness via free call or text to 1737 any time of the day or night to get assistance. Help lines are open 24/7, text or call anytime to reach out to a professional about stress, depression and panic attacks at; Anxiety New Zealand Trust on Freephone (0800 14 269 4389) or Wellington Anxiety Specialists in New Zealand (04 386 3861). You can also contact the following warmlines for peer to peer support to talk to others just like you experiencing mental illness at; Canterbury and West Coast (03 379 8415 / 0800 899 276) (1 pm to midnight, seven nights) Wellington (0800 200 207) (7 pm–1 am, Tuesday to Sunday) Auckland Central 0508 927 654 or 0508 warmline (8 pm to midnight, seven nights).